


Project Runway-stuck

by Whoopwhoop



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Alternate Universe - Crack, Comedy, Project runway - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2012-11-17
Updated: 2012-11-20
Packaged: 2017-11-18 21:44:57
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,006
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/565618
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Whoopwhoop/pseuds/Whoopwhoop
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>
  <i> “Welcome to season one of Project Runway!” Kanaya announced.  </i>
</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Ten talented designers participate in a challenge to make all their dreams come true. Each one has an unique taste and all of them want to win just as badly. Watch romance and hate complicate the way to victory as the show continues. With your host, Kanaya Maryam!</p><p>(This fic is interactive. It has pictures of the designs at the end of each round. There will also be time to vote someone out.)</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Introduction

**Author's Note:**

> In which each character will introduce themselves.

  
  
“Welcome to season one of Project Runway!” Kanaya announced. “The winner of Project runway will receive 5000 boondollars in technology and office-space to bring their creativity to life and run their business, a fashion-spread in Fashion Miracles, a shiny new car and 100.000 boondollar from L’Oreal Cronus to start their own business and a chance to sell and design their own collection.”

-

The streets of Skaia were filled with people. Chaotic to anyone who looks at it from above. But regardless of those people, nothing seems to give away what’s going on in the heads of ten particular....organisms. For those ten the future seems both incredibly clouded and completely clear. All of them striving to win what they feel is almost within reach, but only one can win.

“Let’s meet the designers!”

Gamzee Makara  
“Hi all you mothefuckers out there.” An odd looking troll with clownish make-up started “My name is Gamzee motherfucking Makara. I’m 9 sweeps old and I live in a house of miracles! Honk” The troll scratched behind his ear. “I design whatever the Messiahs tell me is right. Like, if they tell me, Gamzee, that shit is made of miracles, I’ll be making them that shit.”.

Roxy Lalonde   
"Hellooo everyone". A woman with blonde hair, spoke. "My name is Roxy Lalonde and I'm twenty years old". Her voice seemed to slur every few words. "I live in a boootiful house". She continued, stopping every few moments to take a sip of a drink. "I like to design retro and cat related things".

Feferi Peixes  
"Hi! I'm Feferi Peixes and I live in a biiigg underwater themed house! I'm 10 sweeps old!" A troll with long black hair said, bubbly. She seemed to be full of life, "I love to design things that relate to fish! Glub, glub. Hehe". Her current clothes even resembled the colours of the ocean.

Eridan Ampora  
“Hello there, my name is Eridan Ampora. I’m 10 sweeps old and you better remember the name ‘cause it’s the one that will be winnin’” A troll with glasses and his hair slicked back said “My aesthetic is makin’ trolls look as good as the possibly can. It’s really hard most of the time, but I try. Even though some of them are just hopeless.” He flicked his scarf over his shoulder and continued “My house represent me of course, it’s stylish and everything is of the best quality.” Eridan guided the camera towards his closet and continued: “My favourite item is a scarf. An outfit isn’t complete without one.” He quickly moved to another part of his walk-in closet. “My favourite shoes are these ones, they’re real suede from Paris.” The troll looked proud. “My favourite colour is purple, because it’s fuckin’ classy, scarfs are a big plus too. I definitely think I’ll win. The other designers will surely lack in taste compared to me.”

John Egbert  
“Hi! I’m John Egbert, I’m 20 years old and I’ve been designing since.....long! I live in an apartment with my friend Dave. I know a lot of people think designing is for homos but I assure you ladies, I’m not a homosexual!” The black-haired young man sent a toothy grin and a wink from behind his glasses. “When it comes to designing, I definitely like the colour blue. I’m often inspired by the wind for some reason too!” As John waved to the camera he quickly added “I love you dad!”

Dave Strider  
“Sup, the name is Strider, Dave Strider” A blond guy with sunglasses said with a completely straight face. “I design because I can. I also like DJ’ing, but that’s another show”. “I live together with John Egbert, who you’ve probably seen by now. Just so you know, he farts in cars. The silent but deadly kind. Hope he has fun watching this back.” From that point it looked like a part had been cut out because when the scene started it was on another place “My designs are ironic and crappy. I get inspired by giant dipshits that use the word ‘swag’ and ‘yolo’.”

Dirk Strider  
“My name is Dirk Strider, I’m 21.“ Pointy black shades adored the blond man’s face. “Designing is my passion, anime is my game. A dress isn't complete without a bow or a bit of lace. My little pony is the shit and there will definitely be a rainbow dash inspired look. “ Dirk said without a hint that he may be joking. “In my past time I sew plush puppets with gigantic plush rumps. “

Karkat Vantas  
The camera was focused on a grumpy looking man, it looked like he was refusing to talk. After a moment though he finally started to mumble something. “I’m only here because I want to design, no one told me about fucking introducing myself to oxygen-wasting television-dwellers that probably are too fat to even get off their asses to get the remote so they can zap away from this terrible show.” The troll with short black hair seemed to notice that the camera was already recording and grumbled a bit more before introducing himself. “Hello lazy fucks, my name is Karkat Vantas and fuck, who even cares how old I am. I came here to design but instead this corrupt and manipulative world of media has lured me into a reality show that barely has anything to do with designing at all.” The troll took a breath and continued “My aesthetic is clothes that portrait what kind of messed up world this actually is. It’s fucking art, is what it is. I like black and leather and I don’t give a fuck about what you think about it.”

Sollux Captor  
“I’m Sollux Captor.” A nerdy looking man said with a lisp. “I’m 9.3 sweeps old and I don’t really care about designing, I just want 5000 boondollars worth technology. “

Equius Zahhak  
A man shuffled in, he seemed to be sweating a little. He sat down on a chair and introduced himself, "My name is Equius Zahhak..." He patted his forehead with a towel, "I am 10 sweeps old. I like to make robots... my fashion will be.. robot themed. I am very..Strong". His muscles flexed when he said the words 'strong'. "I also love musclebeasts. My fashion will be robots AND musclebeasts, yes".

“We have seen all ten participants!” Kanaya chanted “Until next time, when the designers will face their first challenge!”


	2. Meeting the competition

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which John becomes a protagonist and meets his competition.  
> Also, boner-pants.

Traffic is rushing outside in the city of Skaia. But it wasn’t only the traffic that seemed chaotic, John’s mind was also rushing. Rushing with feelings of nervousness and anticipation. He had hugged his dad and said goodbye for God knows how long. Even though he would miss his dad, he knew it would all be worth it if he won.

Through the speakers of the airport a voice announced its last call for travellers to Skaia city so John threw one look back and hurried towards the gate.

-

The hotel building was huge (like he anticipated) and as he opened the door he noticed he was the first to arrive. The room was stylishly black and white and John figured he could get used to this. It wasn’t much later before the door opened and someone else walked in. John jumped up excited to meet his fellow contestant but as soon as he came face to face with him he froze. This guy....he was dressed head to toe in (he couldn’t describe it as anything else) clown-chic. Complete with face-paint and all. The man didn’t seem to take any notice of John’s hesitation and hugged him as he said “what’s up my motherfucking bro, my name is Gamzee”. John froze. It wasn’t the hug itself that freaked John out so much (even though it most definitely did) but rather John felt something hard poke his belly (and he was quite sure that it wasn’t a juggling stick). When the man released him John saw what had been poking him. The guy had sown a boner to the front of his pants. A. FREAKING. BONER. What the hell!?

Luckily at that moment someone else opened the door. It was Dave and his brother Dirk. “Dave!” John yelled happily while running up to give his bro the best bro-fist he’d ever experienced. “You made it too!” Dave bro-fisted him back and nodded in agreement. “Oh, hi Bro!” John greeted. Bro gave him a thumbs-up and his pointy shades caught the light like they do in anime. As Gamzee made his way over to everyone (hugging them all and without fail earning a strange look at his crotch) they all sat together in the living room.

 

_John: “Wow, that guy Gamzee is really weird! Boner-pants....seriously? Is that even fashion?” John seemed slightly weirded out._

Not much later a fifth person arrived. The door swung open dramatically and in the doorway appeared a rather eccentric looking individual. “No worry, I have arrived! Ampora is the name. Remember it.”

 

_Dave: “Remember the name!” Dave mimicked dramatically. “What a douche.”_

The room went silent and Eridan took this as a sign to strut in and sit down in a chair like it was a throne. “Now I know you’ve been impressed by my stylish appearance, but please, do introduce yourselves. I want to know the names of the people I’ll be defeatin’ ”

 

_Dirk: The blond man signs and puts his hand to his forehead._

“Gamzee Makara” the clownish troll says while leaping forward for a hug. Eridan however puts his hand up and Gamzee stops in his tracks. “No touchin’ this body. It’s been insured against everything. You can’t afford to touch this hot bod.”

 

_Dave: “ ‘Hot bod’? Is this guy for real?” Dave’s eyebrow twitched in annoyance._

We would never know what would’ve happened it Gamzee did touch the ‘hot bod’ though, because that’s when the door opened and two trolls walked in. One was incredibly skinny and tall, the other was grumpy -looking and short.

“Hi, I’m John!” John cheered to the two. The tall one waved disinterested and the small one mumbled something to himself. “Where are our rooms?” mister tall asked with a lisp. “Why don’t you tell us your names first.” Bro cut in. The tall one frowned “Sollux”. Mister small remained silent so Bro repeated “names or GTFO”. “His name is Karkat” Sollux said once the smaller troll still didn’t reply . Sollux glared at Bro and John sensed this might be the start of a beautiful rivalry.

 

_Karkat: “I’ve been here for a minute and I already dislike all of them” Karkat said with crossed arms._

The glaring got interrupted by the final inhabitant of the men-dorm. A buff troll entered sweating excessively. “Could someone hand me a towel?” he said in a low voice. “Just stay there brother, I’ll go and get you a nice towel.” Gamzee said. Within a few seconds he came back and handed over the towel to the sweating troll. “Thanks” he said “I took the stairs because they make your legs STRONG.” He added unnecessarily. Somewhere in the background Eridan mumbled: gross.

 

_Eridan: “I can’t fuckin’ believe it! This is my competition?! I can win this with my eyes closed!”_

Not much later it seemed the girls had all found their rooms too, moreover, they seemed to be getting along pretty well. When they entered the shared living space a blond girl was the first to introduce herself. “Hey y’all! I’m Roxyy!” she slurred. “Please excuse her! She’s been drinking since we arrived! Heheh!” A troll with long hair and a lot of accessories said. “I’m Feferi by the way!” she giggled. Suddenly Eridan jumped out of his claimed chair and walked over to Feferi. “It’s so nice meetin’ you.” He said while shaking her hand and holding on to it just a tiny bit too long. “I’m sure we’ll get along great!” Feferi cheered. To enhance that statement Roxy had apparently found the champagne and yelled in a loud voice “Let’s drink to that!”

 


End file.
